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I keep on going from “I am strong enough to handle this I’ve gone through this before, this has nothing on me, just keep going and eventually the pain will go away, you’ll be happy again just you wait” to “fuck fuck fuck fuck why? but why? what should i do? I can’t do this anymore, I want to not feel anything, I want numbness, I should’ve known, this always happens.” 

I’m on fire .

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